"-blah-I-me-blah-blah-myself-blah-blah-"
"That's nice," I say, nodding.
"-blah-me-blah-myself-blah-I-"
"Could you excuse me for a second?" I get up.
I head to the restroom. I type out the age-old 3 letters into my cell phone and go back to my date.
"-blah-blah-blah-"
wow. I don't even think he noticed I was gone.
All of a sudden,
Spike shows up, all drunk and wobbly, holding a tall margarita.
"Hey... Andrew! whas...............sup?" He's slurring his words.
I look concerned. "You OK, Spike?"
"Uh... um..."
"Looks like you need a ride home."
"Hey no, I'm good... you guys continue your... I'm Spike, nice to -"
Spike holds out an unsteady hand to my date, who's actually stopped talking and looks shocked.
"Andrew, you should take your friend home," my date says.
"Yeah, sorry... I really should. He doesn't look too good. It was nice hanging out with you though..."
"Yeah, I'll call you tomorrow."
Spike and I leave the bar, Spike still staggering until we're out of sight of my date. He then straightens up and pats me on the back.
"Thanks, bud. I didn't know you were such a good actor, though!" I say.
"Acting drunk comes naturally. I've got experience."
"Yeah, so do I. You've got a point."
(more on Spike: nifty; 4-ways)